I have been putting off this post, for the sole reason of not knowing exactly how to go about writing it!
But I'll do my best to describe my first Mexican Wedding experience (although Ricardo tells me that it was not a typical wedding for a Mexican family--it was above and beyond in every way!) The bride's father was the mayor of this town, and they own a hotel as well as several other buildings. This wedding in this town was the equivalent of a huge celebrity wedding bash! Many people who spoke (including the priest) kept mentioning that Fernando was marrying the "favorite daughter in Palomas". Fernando is Ricardo's best friend from high school days back in Juarez, so this was a pretty special wedding!
Fernando and Brisa, May 24th, 2008.
First, there were a few complications about getting to the wedding. It was in Palomas, Chihuahua, Mexico, (if you don't know where that is, it's just across the border from Columbus, New Mexico. If you don't know where that is, I don't think you are missing much). We were in Ciudad Juarez with Ricardo's family, which is 2+ hours away from Palomas if you take Mexico roads. However, crossing the border into El Paso, driving to Columbus, NM, and then crossing the border into Palomas is only about a 1.5 hour drive, so we chose that route.
Because of the crime activities present in Juarez that particular Saturday, we were being cautious about going anywhere, but made it across the bridge into the United States before they closed all the bridges at 4pm (we crossed at about 3:50pm). We had listened to Ricardo's mother, sisters, and brother all telling us to be careful in Palomas, and maybe don't even go, because "son puros narcos alli" (they're all drug traffickers there)...so we decided to only go for a little bit, in fact, we weren't even sure the bridge would be open to cross into Mexico again.
We drove into Palomas, (no problem at the bridge), and ended up driving too far (past the church). We drove through the whole town and had to turn back. But seeing as how the town is only 6 blocks, we didn't waste much time. The church was beautiful, a large Catholic church which was the only beautiful building occupying one entire side of the plaza. Along one side of the church were three or four army trucks filled with soldiers & guns, just watching.
The wedding itself was lovely. They had a large mariachi playing several pieces throughout the service, and it was actually an entire mass, not just a wedding ceremony. Ricardo pointed out a very famous mathematician sitting a few rows in front of us...but I didn't see anyone I knew in the 300+ people in the chapel.
I'll try to describe this as best I know how...the easiest way is to compare it to a movie. Have you seen a movie where there's a Mexican party, a wedding or baptism, or funeral? Especially when it's a movie about drug traffickers or Mexican mafia? The men are in their sombreros, sunglasses, and maybe a vest, or big belt, and boots? Those were the guests...
Following the mass, we all went to a reception hall (owned by the bride's family) for a dinner, open to all. We picked up the famous mathematician and his family on the way, as they had parked their car on the New Mexico side of the border and walked (shows how small the town really is). We passed at least 5 hotels on the way there...impressive for a 6 block town that has no tourist appeal. I don't know the purpose or function of these "hotels" but felt it wiser not to ask.
At the dinner they had to bring in more tables and chairs, and the mariachi played with breaks covered by a dj. The mariachi was another thing....they didn't just play and sing (really well!) but they danced too (not so well) which just cracked Ricardo up! He said they were no good, because Mariachi's are musicians, not dancers or showpeople. We sat at a table with some of Brisa's friends from Michigan, where she currently works, and made some new friends.
Our plan was to not stay long, only to greet Fernando and Brisa and hit the road, but this is where our plan got challenged. First of all, Fernando and Brisa were getting pictures taken and didn't come into the dinnner for a long time, and we ended up getting served plates even though we didn't want to stay for dinner. Second challenge: Fernando's parents recognized Ricardo and gave him lots of hugs and 2 tickets to the "after party"--a closed reception for only close friends and family. Third challenge to our plans to slip out: when Ricardo went to take a picture of Fernando, they talked and Fernando told him: "no me dejes solo!" (don't leave me here alone!) with maybe 400 people present at the dinner, I don't blame him!
Thank you to Sinae for sending us her pictures!!! We had given someone our camera to take this picture, and he just couldn't figure it out.
So, we went across the street to another reception hall, this one even bigger, a converted warehouse with a dancefloor. An area for the bride and groom to sit, next to a table for the cake(s), tables for presents, a stage for the norteña band (the mariachi was still there too...so now there were two bands!), and tables all around. Plus police and bouncers doing a pat down of every male who entered the premises. Again, our plan was to just greet Fernando and Brisa and then slip out, (it was already dark and we still had to drive back to El Paso).
Gorgeous Cake!
We didn't wait as long for Fernando and Brisa to arrive this time, but they processed in all the Padrinos and Madrinos (godparents--people who are "sponsors" or honored guests or fulfilled a role of some sort in this wedding/marriage). Usually there are maybe 6, or 10, lined up on either side of the bride and groom, but this wedding had close to 100 (stopped counting when I got to the 80's)! They encircled the entire dance floor! It was a big group, plus the 200-300?? others in the salon who constituted the "close family & friends" reception!
When the bride and groom came in, they had their first dance, danced with their parents, and then tossed the bouquet and garter. So, after about an hour at this reception, and just when the music was starting to get really loud (for dancing, not for being able to talk to anyone around you), we went to say hello again to our friends, and let them know we were taking off. One more round of pictures, and then we slipped out, crossed the border without a problem (they asked us if the wedding was done--it being only 10:30pm, we said no, the party was just starting but that we had a long drive).
About to throw the bouquet. In Mexico, you have to dance in a long chain around the bride and groom first.
We got to Juan and Celina's house in El Paso just after midnight, and told them about the wedding over bowls of cereal. They confirmed that this wedding sounded like the extreme: the wedding of the century in Mexico! I'm so glad I got to experience it!
Then we listened to Car Talk on the internet, because it turns out that earlier that morning I was on the show! (but couldn't hear it live in Mexico).
If you want to hear it,
click here to go to the website. Make sure it's the right week (Original air date, Saturday, May 24), and I'm on Segment 6, entitled: "Do I have to fill my tank when it's on F?" It was actually a lot of fun...and I made Tom and Ray laugh, so I'm pretty happy with it.
This is what they sent as a thank you!
